Harry Potter and the Teenage Angst
by sheepcat
Summary: Draco's being as annoying as ever, so Hermione is charged with the responsibility of trying to break his black heart. Revenge is sweet but how far will it go...?
1. Chapter 1:A plot is hatched

Harry Potter and the Teenage Angst  
  
It was a cloudy day at Hogwarts and Harry sat by the window moodily making card houses. He was now very handsome with his emerald green eyes and jet black hair. Hermione was by the fire using Crookshanks as a sort of alive fur muff because of the cold weather. Crookshanks didn't seem to mind though because he got to chew a pair of Hermiones gloves. Ron was dozing gently underneath his potions homework, the parchment wrapped around him. The Gryffindor common room wasn't too busy because most people had gone down to the library to pick up the new copy of Pincer. A book about an emphatic crab fighting for his rights in a cruel modern world. It had gone straight to the top of the book sale charts.  
  
Harry was looking slightly happier because he had got to an as yet unprecedented level of card house. Ron woke up with a start and took one look at his potions homework and uttered a small swearword. Hermione glared at the flurry of activity that was Ron, annoyed by his use of the swearword. "Ron!" He looked up enquiringly, still ensconced in parchment but holding a quill in his hand poised to do his homework. "Why didn't you do that earlier!" He shrugged and continued with his homework. Ginny wandered in. "Did you get that copy of Pincer you wanted?" asked Hermione conversationally. Ginny walked over to a seat near the fire and sank down into the seat. "No, Draco Malfoy did." She said angrily. Harry looked mildly surprised that Draco Malfoy could read. Ron was more forthcoming "He doesn't even like reading! Why did he get it first?" Ginny huddled into a small ball because of the cold. "He did it to annoy people and he got it first because his daddy gave a grant to the library!"  
  
Harry looked faintly contemptuous but then got engrossed in a game of clock patience. "Yes I know Harry it is pitiful isn't it?" said Ginny also in a contemptuous tone. Hermione nodded but then realised Crookshanks had been chewing her favourite glove. She mended it with a flick of her wand and looked up. "I'm not sure you're right there. He's been trying to impress Lavender Brown." Harry glanced up with a face that was clearly saying, "Yes he has been in a Casanova mood for a bit hasn't he?" Ron was feverishly scribbling down on his parchment about the virtues of a miracle potion. Hermione looked critically at him "It will be a virtue of a miracle if Snape can read that!" she leant back in her chair quietly chuckling at her joke. Ron shot her a filthy look.  
  
Ginny, who had been in contemplation for a while suddenly re- animated. "Yes, you are right. I saw him give Lavender a significant look." Harry nodded, his whole air saying, "By the virtue of the fact that Draco is trying to get Lavender, I wonder how long it will be before she relents and agrees to court him." Except probably in more teenager-like terms. He started a new game of patience. Ron, who was taking a respite from scribbling feverishly, chipped into the conversation " You don't like him, do you?" he asked worriedly. Hermione and Ginny both instantly replied with a loud "NO!" both looking revolted. Harry and Ron both were relieved.  
  
Hermione suddenly stood up misplacing a formerly comfortable Crookshanks who hissed and ran under a chair. His yellow eyes glinting reproachfully. "I have the most brilliant idea!" This got the whole rooms attention. Probably because she shouted it and was standing up with a lightbulb over her head. "Watch the light." Hermione read from Harry's face and obediently moved a little to the left. "Why don't we set up a masquerade!" Seeing that all of her audience wore blank faces she went on to explain. "One of us girls could pretend to be interested in Malfoy and when he's interested, dump him for someone else! That would definitely set him down a peg or two." She sat down, awaiting feedback. Ron was suspiciously looking at her, Ginny was looking horrified as if someone had told her she had won a romantic date with Voldemort in the Shrieking Shack and Harry was gazing abstractly into space.  
  
"What!?!" exploded Ron. Hermione was just about to speak in defence of her project when they noticed Harry. His expression was of someone who would say "Wait a minute this might just work!" Hermione spoke reassuringly "It's OK Ron neither of us would get emotionally involved." Glancing at her flame-haired friend that she cherished slightly more than friendly feelings for. Secretly she was quite gratified by his reaction.  
  
"Who will do it?" asked Ginny still wearing a face that was strongly suggestive that she had just found some rotting kippers in her shoes. "Parchment, Quaffle and Wand? Loser gets the, the honour." Said Hermione, her mouth twisting slightly. Ginny nodded quietly still wearing a look that was like she had just found a tarantula in her bed. After a viscous bout of parchment, quaffle and wand it was decided. That both of them would have a go because they had forgotten how to play that particular game. Also both wanted revenge. All the people in the room identical evil smiles except Harry who was still gazing abstractly out of the window. 


	2. Chapter 2: Step One

(A/N: I am very sorry for this taking so long to update, I promise that I will try to update chapters 4, 6, 8 etc quicker. In case you hadn't guessed, I am the co-writer Cazza, and I hope that you don't find the different styles to annoying.)  
  
Disclaimer: if you haven't guessed that we're not J K Rowling then you shouldn't be reading this.  
  
It was decided that the first step of operation get-Draco-Malfoy-back-for- all-the-evil-and-despicable-things-he's-ever-done-and-put-him-in-his-place was to study him for the first few days so they could get a better picture of his likes, dislikes etc. Actually, that was the second step, as the first was to find a shorter operation name. The following morning the trio went downstairs for breakfast (Ginny refused to get up before 8 o'clock), keeping an eye out for Malfoy. He was nowhere to be seen in the Great Hall, although Crabbe and Goyle could very easily be seen as the others at the Slytherin table had slid down the far end to protect their robes from flying food.  
  
They seated themselves at the Gryffindor table, helping themselves to large portions of porridge and toast, though not on the same plate, with Hermione glancing at the door every now and again, but her 'love' did not show up. After breakfast was Herbology with Hufflepuff, so the plan had to be put on hold until they actually saw the target. The lesson went well, except for one of Ron's mandrakes, which had acquired a horrible cold and kept jet- propelling itself back out of the flowerpot after he planted it with what would be deafening sneezes had they not had their fluffy earmuffs on. Tired and covered in earth from trying to catch the airborne mandrake, the three traipsed from the greenhouse to the castle, with Hermione leaving to go to Ancient Runes.  
  
Divination was as boring as always, except as it was Professor Trelawny's birthday she had decided to burn several sticks of special, extra strong incense which not only could be smelt halfway along the corridor but hung at the top of the classroom in thick purple smog, clogging the lungs of anyone unfortunate enough to stand up. After what seemed like several years the bell rang and Harry and Ron dashed for the trap door, emerging from the room in wheezing fits. After managing to get an ample supply of oxygen to their lungs they made their way to the common room, eager to find out whether Hermione or Ginny had had any luck finding anything about Malfoy.  
  
Neither had seen him. Hermione made the comment that now even when he's not around he's annoying them. It was Defence Against the Dark Arts next, so there was no chance of finding him then. Ron suddenly dashed about, muttering some un-typable words and frantically snatching up parchment from the table. All of a sudden he yelled and jumped backwards as a startled Crookshanks shot from underneath a pile of parchment, hissing as his bed was disturbed. A curious Hermione enquired as to what exactly he was doing. In between profanities he said something about realising his homework wasn't in his bag and he couldn't remember where he'd left it. Hermione picked up a crumpled piece of parchment with chew marks from under the table and held it between her thumb and index finger, 'is this it?' she asked. He glanced up from his current position, being upside-down on the armchair whilst peering underneath and heaved a sigh of relief. It was indeed his homework, though slightly dog-eared, and he rammed it in his bag just before the bell went to signify 5 minutes 'til lessons.  
  
Defence Against the dark Arts was also uneventful apart from the 3ft long homework essay they received. Harry had not been at all pleased, he already had enough homework to cram in between Quidditch practice, without adding to his load. Still muttering under their breath it was a rather grumpy group that made their way to the Great Hall for lunch.  
  
Their mood was not helped by the cheerful Ginny that greeted them and announced that she had no homework. They tried to forget their sorrow by gorging themselves, and although Ron seemed slightly better for the tons he consumed, they remained gloomy when they considered the prospect of 2 more lessons before the end of school. Ginny had been somewhat put out at their negativity, although halfway through lunch she suddenly announced 'I have something to tell you that will definitely cheer you up!' The three looked up doubtfully but when she continued 'Draco Malfoy has just walked in!' their doubtful look turned into disbelief. Why should they care whether Malfoy had walked in, and why should it cheer them up? It dawned on Hermione first, and she suddenly went 'ooooooooh!' and turned in her seat to look at him.  
  
There was no mistaking that white-blond hair or that slight smirk. Hermione studied him carefully, watching how he worked amongst others. He seemed very confident and popular, although she already knew that. Suddenly, she overheard him say about the dreadful performance of the Hogsmeade Hunters in their most recent match. He obviously took an interest in Quidditch, wait, she knew that too! Apparently he was not very deep, and everything about him was well known to the public. 'Well, duh!' she thought. She could have realised that for herself, she didn't need the ferret-boy around to show her he was totally shallow. Maybe the second step of the operation wasn't such a good idea, after all, what was the point of wasting a few days, when they could start with the fiendishly clever plan of hers properly? She turned to the rest of the group with her suggestion when Ron spoke instead; 'I think we know all we need to about our peroxide pal, I mean he is so one- dimensional. Why don't we just get on with breaking his almost non-existent black heart?' the rest of the group nodded in agreement, feeling that at least the knowledge that they were going to get Malfoy would help them through the rest of the day.  
  
Hermione narrowed her eyes slightly at Ron when he voiced her idea before her, although she smiled inwardly, thinking how observant he could be when he wanted to be. All through the next two lessons, the 3 felt anticipation bubbling through them, and evil pleasure welled up even more every time they thought about how stupid Malfoy was going to look after all this. Hermione was planning her tactics, well, she was until Ron stole the piece of parchment and exclaimed 'oh my god Hermione, you're strategising!? This is supposed to be fun for us, don't spoil it!' so she had to put her campaign away. After school finished the 4 met up in the Gryffindor common room and sat round a circular table near the fire, doing their homework as quickly as possible so they could route out Malfoy and put their wicked plan into action. How they were going to commence with the plan they had no idea, but hey, that's for the next chapter! 


	3. Chapter 3: Womble fever

Chapter 3

"This is hopeless!"

"And sick!"

Hermione and Ginny were discussing the situation of Operation Mushroom Tango (for want of a better name, Ron had been feeling hungry when he thought of it). So far they had tried everything they could think of to attract Malfoy's attention. Including falling in front of him, where he just stepped over them and continued talking to Crabbe and Goyle. Next they had tried pretending to find his (really non-existent) homework but he just nicked it and ran off. 

Harry was reading a complicated piece of literature called 'The man who thought his wife was a hat' (A.N really there is a book by that name!). Ron was doing his homework i.e feverishly scrabbling bits of paper around and putting what looked like several neat ink blots on each page. It was Sunday afternoon and the gang was relaxing in the Common room. 

Then suddenly Harry caught their attention. He looked very much like a person who would say, "What about a weak love potion, just to attract his attention. Y'know?"

"Of course! That's a great idea Harry!" cried Hermione. 

And so Hermione and Ginny scooted off, namely to gather the ingredients of the 'luuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurve potion'.

Soon they were all gathered around a cheerfully bubbling potion (except Harry who was still engrossed in a particularly interesting chapter of his book) and grinning maniacally like mentally unstable's on loony pills. It was a pale shade of mauve and little blue bubbles kept floating out of it, only to pop and leave behind a faint smell of roses. 

Hermione seemed to realise she was 'grinning maniacally like a mentally unstable on loony pills' and pulled herself together "Right, ahem, the timing on this *must* be exact. Ginny, you're in charge of that okay? In…." she checked the book "…30 minutes exactly, call me. Got that?" Ginny nodded in affirmation.

"…Guys…. What are you doing…?" Came a voice from behind them. They spun round "Neville?!" The whole group simultaneously was trying to look totally innocent. But failed and ended up looking like someone had a scribbled 'guilty' in very large letters in pink highlighter all over their faces then hung a cardboard square round their necks announcing 'these people are guilty', just to make sure. "What are you doing?" repeated Neville in a confused manner. 

Hermione had a brainwave "…Nothing…." 

"Yes….Nothing…" the rest of the group echoed hastily.

Ginny picked up a spoon "Just making….soup…" Ron nodded vigorously and took the spoon from Ginny and took a sip of the potion "Mmmm soup!" 

The fact that the supposed 'soup' was purple and had blue bubbles floating out of it completely passed Neville by. "Ok! See ya!" And he proceeded downstairs happily.

Hermione watched him go. "Talk about gullible…." Ginny snickered, Ron…Ron was curiously silent. "Ron…?" Hermione turned round and looked at him, then at the spoon in his hand. "Oh….Dear…." Ron was staring at Hermione as if she were Venus who had suddenly appeared and told him he'd won a million billion trillion gizillion….a lot of money. In other words, as if he were in love with dear Hermy. Ron would definitely think twice about tasting so called 'soup' again. 

Hermione savored the moment for a while, then when she realise Ginny was looking at her oddly, she stopped having daydreams about her running into Ron's arms in a beach setting with romantic music being played by deep centaurs. Harry was trying his best not laugh. Hermione suddenly went a fiery shade of red and rectified Ron's mistake quickly with a flick of her wand. "Ahem…" she spoke quickly, with a dazed looking Ron glancing around confusedly "Well it's a tad too strong right now, we've got…" she checked her watch "twenty minutes left…" Ginny nodded "I'll just go and see if 'Pincer' is there yet…"

~Twenty five minutes later~ 

"Oh noooo!" Ginny dashed to the cauldron and awoke a dozing Hermione. She tried not to look flustered. "I think it's ready…" Hermione yawned "It's just in time for tea!" Ron added gleefully coming down from the boy's dormitory stretching. Harry was on the penultimate chapter of the book. 

"Let's go down." Harry put his book down regretfully and Hermione took a vial of the potion. They were going to put it in Malfoy's pumpkin juice and they would make sure either Ginny or Hermione were the first to talk to him. Simple….in theory. But then again aren't the simple plans sometimes the best? Well, most of the time…

And so the gang went downstairs and by a cunning arrangement with Dobby (who coincidentally, also had a score to settle with a certain Rat-boy) who would put the potion in Draco's pumpkin juice. Dobby was waiting for them by the statue of Gregory the Smarmy. His bulbous eyes glowed as he took the vial. Revenge is soooo sweet. (A.N hehehehehehehehhehehheheheh…..)

Sitting at dinner they watched the peroxide wonder closely. So closely, in fact, that he began to get a little freaked by their stares and evil chuckling. He took a long draught of his pumpkin juice to wet his dry throat. He'd go over a deal with them he thought vehemently. Then suddenly, he felt peaceful and joyful. Outwardly, his eyes glazed over and he began swaying to a tune. Crabbe and Goyle looked severally alarmed, and began making (quite sweet)-concerned grunts. Then quite suddenly Draco Malfoy jumped up and began singing…

Underground, overground,

Wombling free!

The wombles of Wimbledon,

Common are we.

Making good use of the things that we find,

Things that everyday folk leave behind…etc.

By now Malfoy had caught the attention of everyone in the hall. Including the plotters, as Hermione turned her wrathful gaze on Ginny. "About that exact timing…." 

Ginny flushed scarlet "Well, it was only five minutes…" Hermione threw her hands up in despair and then turned to watch the highly entertaining spectacle of Malfoy being a Womble.

The whole hall was in hysterics, even the teacher table. Even though they were trying their very best, they couldn't stop laughing. Excluding Snape who couldn't actually see or hear because his greasy hair had gotten so out of control. 

Hermione bit her lip to stop the giggles escaping. "Onto Plan B…" she murmured.

~*~

Well that was Chapter 3 done by moi under the pain of death from my dear co-writer. 

The next installment will come when we have a million reviews or my co-writer can be bothered.

Algiers: Hum…I can't believe you actually finished the chapter…

Sheep the Adventurer: -looks proud-

Algiers: Who are you and what have you done with Sheep the Adventurer!?

Sheep the Adventurer:….-injured silence-

…………..Oh and REVIEW GODDAMMIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (No offence meant)


	4. Chapter 4: Plan B

Disclaimer: I'm not J.K. Rowling, Sheep isn't J.K. Rowling, no one is J.K. Rowling except her, ok? Now I'm gonna get on with the story.  
  
To Recap: Hermione bit her lip to stifle the giggles escaping. "Onto Plan B." she murmured.  
  
Onto Plan B was easier said than done, mainly because they had no Plan B at the moment. They spent all of lunch break in the library, ransacking their brains for a new angle, and shouting out "I've got it!" and "Eureka!" (though not jumping out of their chair and running round the room naked) and earning disapproving glances from Madame Pince. However, despite the fact that they gave frequent outbursts of optimism, the most likely plan that could work was buying a sexy goldfish and sending it anonymously (A/N believe me, someone has actually done this! I read it in J-17!). Needless to say, and it really is needless, they had no breakthroughs, and it was a forlorn group that returned to afternoon lessons.  
  
Suddenly, Hermione screamed, hugged Ginny, kissed both Harry and Ron and ran off in the general direction of either the toilets or the common room. The group guessed it was the latter, as it would be rather a strange ritual to perform every time she went to the loo, although Ron would really not have minded if she had decided to go totally off her rocker and repeat this act every time she needed to answer the call of nature (and we're not talking yodelling here people!)  
  
Anyway, returning from the somewhat straying story, the group gave puzzled looks, shrugged their shoulders and thought 'the pressure has finally got to her'. Ginny departed to potions whilst Harry and Ron rustled their way to Care of Magical Creatures. I say rustled because the leaves had been blown from the forest in several gales and had formed a 30cm blanket from the main entrance to the edge of the forest and reached as far as the lake, if that was what the soggy mass of leaves was.  
  
As the two boys neared Hagrid's hut, they heard a commotion and hurried to where a whole group of students were gathered. They pushed there way through and stopped open-mouthed at the sight that beheld them. A girl that seemed remarkably familiar was standing in the opening, wearing a skirt that was almost non-existent and several necklaces, bangles and rings, including a blood red belly-button one that was extremely visible thanks to her small top and gaping robe. Her hair was long and straight, cascading down her back in waves of brown. A bag was hanging off her shoulder, overflowing with old volumes, quills and roll after roll of parchment with small tidy writing in it that was obviously notes. It now dawned on the two boys who this girl was. It was Hermione. She spotted them and smiled, her teeth remarkably whiter than they remembered, and strolled across to them, swinging her hips in extreme exaggeration. She turned to Ron and closed his gaping mouth then put on an innocent face. 'What?' she enquired 'is there something wrong?' Harry just stood transfixed, and after a while Ron put a stop to his wandering eyes and stammered 'err, no, there's nothing wrong it's just a slightly different look for you 'Mione, and I have to say, quite a nice look.' Ron now trailed off as his ears turned a burning red. Hermione glowed with what they put down to delight, peered at them from under her eyelashes and said 'thanks!' in a soft, seductive tone. Ron cleared his throat and began 'shall we,' his voice was about 3 octaves higher than usual. He coughed and continued, ' shall we go to the lesson?'  
  
All through the lesson people kept staring at Hermione. Neville had tied a lead to the wrong end of a Blast-Ended Skrewt and was being dragged backwards across the ground. Seamus didn't seem to notice that the Flobberworms were crawling up his arm and The Little Book of Monsters had chewed up all of Dean Thomas' homework for the lesson. Harry was acting as though nothing was different, but he couldn't get over how different she looked, and Ron was just gone. Whenever she said something to him he would gaze at her, doing an excellent impression of a goldfish (opening and closing his mouth) and totally looking as if he was on Pluto and trying to hear Professor Flitwick whispering the antidote to an irreversible love potion. Eventually when she asked him what colour the sky was he looked up and replied 'it's a wonderful romantic pink and the sun is a wonderful girl, I mean gold.' Hermione gawped at him and exchanged worried and slightly, no, really freaked out glances with Harry. 'Are you all right Ron?' she asked. His reply was even more odd than the last, 'oh thank you for asking my love, of course I'll marry you.' Hermione smiled and edged slowly away from him. They continued feeding the Flobberworms, jumping up every now and then when Neville shot underneath them.  
  
By the end of the lesson none of the boys (with the exception of Harry) had managed to complete their work properly, and Draco had missed several moments where he could ridicule and scorn Hermione, which considering he was an annoying, evil, creepy and obnoxious little prick was quite surprising. Hagrid had managed to capture the runaway Skrewt and a very shaky Neville could be seen wobbling his way towards the forest. Hagrid picked him up and turned him in the right direction before wrestling the Skrewt back into the box. It was the end of lessons for the day and in the common room Ginny was exceedingly impressed with the result of her work. As they had decided that Hermione would actually carry out the plan as she was in the same year as him, Ginny had taken charge of doing hair/make-up and so on, unless Hermione failed, in which case Ginny would take over.  
  
In case you hadn't guessed, the reason Hermione had shrieked and hugged/kissed people earlier was in fact she had thought of Plan B, and for those who are either slow or confused by my weird style of writing Plan B was not to try and force him to like the girls, but to totally mess with his hormonal male mind. True, he was a mean, selfish Slytherin but he was also a teenage boy, and even he could not defy nature and ignore attractive girls, no matter what their bloodline. Hermione had asked Ginny for help to totally transform herself to catch Draco's eye, make him more and more interested, then drop him. Judging by his inability to say anything insulting earlier, phase 1 had already begun.  
  
Anyway, back to the story. By now the whole of Gryffindor tower was buzzing about Hermione's new look and she was getting very annoyed with the constant interruptions from her homework by people asking her questions. Eventually when a small, timid, foreign first year whispered 'excuse me pretty lady, could you please show me way to toilet?' she barked 'NO!' gathered her things and flew off in a rage to the girls' dorms, where a muffled slamming echoed down the stairway. The shocked newcomer stood speechless with a trembling lower lip before Ginny walked over and comforted her.  
  
'Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew!' whistled Ron, 'touch-y! Surely with all those brains she would have worked out that not only the peroxide prat would notice her transformation but everyone else would as well?! What did she think, only the person who was the target would notice?' Harry, who was engrossed in a Potions essay, just nodded as Ron continued for half an hour on how daft Hermione had been and how silly that idea was because Draco didn't have a heart but it was working on other people and so on and so on.  
  
By now it was time to go down for dinner, so Ginny ventured up to tell Hermione and the boys waited for her at the portrait hole. After a few minutes quite a defeated Hermione came escorted by Ginny, who was supporting her crying friend down the stairs. When the girls got to Harry and Ron, they were very concerned. Whilst Harry took Hermione off Ginny's shoulder and took her down to the hall, Ron and Ginny held back. 'What's up with Hermione, is there something wrong?' Ron whispered to her as he watched Hermione with apprehension. Ginny smiled when she heard the real worry in his voice and assured him that no, there was nothing wrong, Hermione was just a bit confused with the new 'her' and upset that she'd shouted at that poor first year.  
  
When they reached the Great Hall, practically everyone turned to look at the new girl, before they realised it was actually Hermione, that intelligent 6th year prefect who had gone under a massive transformation. The heads turned to watch her progress through the hall, some people remarkably resembling owls in the flexibility of their necks. Draco Malfoy was one of the ones watching her closely, a strange look on his face; a mixture of hatred, admiration and fighting something. Hermione noticed this and smiled at him, fluttering her newly lengthened eyelashes. His face flushed and he looked away.  
  
She arrived at the table and seated herself so she faced away from everyone. She ate quietly, talking only to Ron and Ginny, as Harry had to gobble his food to get to Quidditch practice. He soon disappeared off to collect his robes and broom and so it was just the 3 and an empty chair. But that chair wasn't left unoccupied for long. Draco Malfoy seated himself in it, next to Hermione, and whispered 'why are you doing this Mudblood?'  
  
'Doing what?' she returned.  
  
'This,' he replied, looking her up and down then looking away again almost as if he was in pain, 'changing, a lot! Why?' She gazed sideways at him.  
  
'Why, don't you like it Draco?' she breathed so only he could hear. At this he closed his eyes and shivered, his nerves tingling. She continued, 'it's all for you, you know? If you want it.' he gulped, 'why are you torturing me?'  
  
Hermione giggled, 'ooh, am I? Well, if I'm being a naughty girl, you'd better punish me, hadn't you?'  
  
'Don't tempt me,' he appealed 'I don't want to, you're a Mudblood, I can't.' he turned to her, 'my father, he'd kill me, or worse, he'd make sure I was never, you know, a man.' He trembled again. Hermione found this extremely funny; after all it wasn't often a Slytherin confided in a Gryffindor about such things, but she had to keep up the charade, this idea might work after all. 'Well, if your father doesn't find out then he couldn't do anything could he? It could be our little secret,' she suggested.  
  
'But, what if.' he began  
  
'But nothing, are you going to let your father dictate to you how to run your life and make all your decisions for you? Don't you want to be independent? Don't you want to take control of your life, your feelings? Besides, if you don't tell anyone, and I don't, how could he find out, and even if somehow he did, you can deny it, can't you? This speech had persuaded him. Hermione mentally thanked her old primary school for making her head in debates so she could practice her persuasive language. 'You're right, I should be head of my own life, I should be in charge. Ok, how about we meet up sometime on Saturday, possibly go to Hogsmeade or something?' he asked. 'Ok, see you on Saturday,' she answered.  
  
'Right, see you.' With that he walked off out of the hall, leaving Hermione at the table explaining to Ron and Ginny everything that was said, whilst they were in hysterics, and thinking where will they go, what should she wear, what should she say, after all, she needed this to go perfectly to finally get back at that worm and Saturday was only 2 days away!  
  
A/N I am extremely sorry for the delay and apologetic for any damage or withdrawal symptoms I may have caused for the my long absence, and I'm sure that as I'm so nice and kind and wonderful, you will all of course forgive me. Thanks in advance! 


	5. Chapter 5: Lesser Spotted Romneys

Harry Potter and the Teenage Angst

Chapter 5: Lesser Spotted Romneys

Thump "Ouch." Thump "Ouch." Thump "Ouch." Thump "DAMN HORMONES!!! DAMN PUBERTY!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!" 

A few Slytherins looked up and tried to ignore the occasional expostulation or curse coming from the dormitories. Looking down once more at their homework they busily put quill to parchment. Thump "Ouch." One of the Slytherin girls looked up and sighed heavily "Can't someone do something about it?" she complained, jerking her head in the general direction of the sounds. The male section of the Slytherin's in the common room was shaken out of their reverie, which mainly centered on a certain Gryffindor brunette. The females shook their heads tiredly.

Meanwhile, outside Draco Malfoy was banging his head against a wall. Crabbe and Goyle hovered around him emitting small concerned grunts from time to time. "Oh my god…" breathed Draco and leant against the wall. His head pounding after half an hour's worth of hitting his head. And banging ones head against a particularly hard wall never does ones constitution any good. Unfortunately, or maybe fortunately, Draco was too depressed to actually care. Crabbe laid a comforting hand on the pale-haired Slytherins shoulder " Mudblood." He said understandingly. Goyle piped in with "**Crush**." 

"For Gods sake! Talk properly!!!" shouted Draco. The two, only having as much brain activity between them as long dead grain of rice, they found more than a monosyllabic phrase taxing but at times could come up with surprisingly long sentences for them. Sometimes.

Draco growled at his posse "Aaah you don't understand! She's asked me to meet her on Saturday in Hogsmeade! And if my father found out…" Draco bit his lip. "He might….de-man me…" he whimpered. "BUT…" a crafty expression came over his face. "But…" he subsided into a sly silence.

Crabbe and Goyle exchanged confused looks "But what?" Goyle asked finally. Malfoy didn't reply. He tapped his fingers together with an altogether evil look on his face. Before collapsing through concussion. 

~*~

Ginny giggled and picked out an outfit out of Hermione's wardrobe. "What is this?" she held up a thick woolen sweater with small cats prancing around on it. Hermione turned a deep crimson "I like it!" she said defensively. Ginny grinned, "Well, its goodbye to that then!" she carelessly threw it on the floor. Hermione sprang down to rescue it and smoothed out the wrinkles. Ginny watched her "You cannot wear that, rat boy won't like it." Hermione sighed "I can't believe what I'm reduced to." Sitting down on the bed. Ginny sat down by her "You're not reduced to anything! Come on, think. REVENGE ON DRACO MALFOY!!!" she said in a cheery voice. Hermione lay down "The date is in two hours time, I don't have anything to wear…" she groaned. "Oh yeah…" Ginny replied "You can borrow some!" she added brightly.

Hermione gave a wavering smile.

Later Parvarti had kindly leant Hermione a skirt and a top. "Isn't that lucky?" prompted Ginny to Hermione. The brunette sighed and summoned a smile "Yeah s'pose." Ginny looked sympathetic, "You know, Hermione," she started quietly "You don't have to do this…" For a moment Hermione was tempted, just going back to her normal life would be nice. But then suddenly images flashed through her mind. Malfoy calling her 'mudblood', Malfoy rejoicing at the opening of the Chamber of Secrets, Malfoy flicking peas at her, Malfoy insulting her, Malfoy slaughtering innocent rabbits- the flow of images paused. *Don't think he did that…oh well* thought Hermione. Malfoy cheating at Quidditch, Malfoy supporting Voldemort, being Umbridge's agent, Malfoy being Malfoy. Hermione stood up with a grim look on her face "Rat boys going to pay…" she said fiercely. Ginny grinned "That's the spirit! Now, we need to do your make-up!" Hermione sat down obediently "Beautify me woman!" she cried dramatically. They both laughed.

Fifteen minutes- and a thoroughly bored Hermione- later, the two girls went down the dormitory staircase to the common room. Ron who had been seemingly wrestling with his homework looked up, looking like a mummy. Immediately his ears started to burn and were dangerously close to spontaneous combustion. Harry had been messing with the fire and getting to know his pyromaniac side. He stood up smoking slightly. On catching sight of Hermione he smirked evilly, as if saying ' knock 'em dead!'. Or rather 'knock 'im dead' as it was only Draco they wanted to humiliate. Or if you were to be very precise it would be 'knock him dead', which would be using proper English. If you were to a perfectionist it would be 'you are well on the way to breaking Draco's black and nefarious heart'. But as nobody in the room was a) precise (apart from maybe Hermione, but she was too preoccupied to care) b) a perfectionist, they settled for 'knock 'em dead'.

Ron was looking in severe pain, as his ears were nearing the white-hot stage. Harry realised and with a start ran over to his unfortunate friend and dropped the nearest available liquid on him…

~Later~

Parvarti walked in chatting good-naturedly with Lavender "…you know, that perfume was what my uncle gave me just before his expedition to Tibet. It's the only thing I have to remember him by, until he comes back –sniff-, I miss him so much…But as long as I have the perfume I feel fine! Its like a sort of…link! Wait….." A deadly silence followed. Then a small whimper emerged from Pavarti "I left it right here…"

~Back~

The group went down stairs giggling hysterically like they had obtained a canister of laughing gas and simultaneously been tickled, excluding Ron. Who smelt like the wonderful fragrance of…Eu de Fleur. Occasionally growling ominously, he cast evil looks at each of the group in turn. Ginny stopped suddenly "HERMIONE!" They others stopped, startled. "What?" asked Hermione in confusion "Stop laughing so much, it'll ruin your make-up if your cry all over it…" commented Ginny casually as she went ahead of them down the stairs. "Aren't I beautiful enough without the mask?" muttered Hermione darkly. "I heard that!" floated up the stairs. "That's some good hearing!" said Ron, looking impressed. "Now, will someone get rid of this stench?" 

~*~

Draco was standing nervously in the front hall, he was wearing jeans and a shirt and a pale- paler face that normal. He raked a hand through his hair tensely. "Why?" he asked himself silently. His common sense, which had previously been trampled by the viscous hordes of hormones passing by, had weakly emerged once more and was making a brave attempt to fight back against the hormones. The battle was doomed from the start, and the war, his common sense hadn't even bothered. 

"Draco?" a musical voice questioned uncertainly. He turned round to see the stairs and a pair of shoes. His eyes traveled slowly up to her face and romantic violin music appeared from nowhere. Draco moved forward as if in a dream. Until…

"Hey! Watch where you're going buddy! Sheesh…" an annoyed violin player, "If people keep walkin' around like morons I'll never get this romantic piece done…" the violin player's complaints grew fainter as he walked away. Hermione bit back a laugh "Are you okay?" she asked with concern. Hermione had always prided herself on her acting skills. Draco nodded shakily "Yes." He croaked then cleared his throat. "Let's go then, shall we?" he held out an arm towards her. She smiled graciously "Of course." *This is too easy…* thought Draco deviously. *This is too easy…* thought Hermione deviously. *What is the meaning of life? * Thought a random person down the hall.

They engaged in a light discourse en route to Hogsmeade. The day was a beautiful one. The sky was blue and the sun shone cheerfully. The plankton flew overhead, singing and occasionally landing in the trees. 

Hermione tittered politely at a joke made by Malfoy *I wish he would look at my face sometimes…* she thought sourly. Draco, on the other hand, was congratulating himself *The Malfoy charm works once again. Bingo!* he thought triumphantly. Hermione looked at the scenery "We're nearly there." She said to Draco. He nodded, "Want to go to The Three Broomsticks first or visit some shops?" Hermione deliberated for a moment "I need a new quill…mind if we shop around a bit first?" Draco shot her a roguish look "Of course!"

Hermione smiled at him and looked away "Is that someone on the ground?" she asked, narrowing her eyes. As they approached the person scrambled up. They eyed Draco distastefully then beamed at Hermione "Hello!" she greeted her. "Hi Luna!" the brunette said happily. Luna looked at Draco "Er…hello." She said to him uncertainly as he was holding Hermione's arm. Draco looked down his nose at her, without acknowledging her presence he hissed to Hermione "Carry on walking!" As he was holding her arm she had very little choice but to follow "I'll be there in a moment Ma-Draco." She said charmingly and tugged her arm gently out of his grip. He let go grudgingly and carried on walking. She turned back to Luna "Sorry about that. I-"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!" Hermione whirled round just in time to see Draco disappearing down a manhole (or to be politically correct, a person hole). She looked at Luna with panic "What happened?!" she yelled. Luna looked slightly guilty "Well, I, er was looking for Lesser spotted Romney and, erm I heard they lived under manholes….So I decided to take a look…" she trailed off. "Sorry." She added hopefully. Hermione shook her head and walked over to the hole in the ground *I wonder why he didn't see it…* she thought frowning. One word, hormones.

"GET ME OUT OF HERE!!!" screamed Draco. Hermione knelt by the hole "Its okay! Nothing bad is down there! There's only darkness, mould, excrement and…." She trailed off "Yeah…" Luna came over and shouted "Watch out for the Lesser Spotted Romneys! THEY BITE!" A terrified whisper reached the two girls "….What?"

"Nothing!" 

"No really- wait, something just touched my leg…"

A silence fell. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!" Time seemed to slow as Draco Malfoy did a record-breaking leap that would have made any salmon proud. He landed breathless out of the manhole. Hermione rushed to his side "Are you alright?" she asked worriedly. He pointed to some small bite marks on his ankle. Luna gazed in fascination then punched the air and whooped "Proof! Yeah!" she cried joyfully. 

"It think it may have been a rat…" mused Hermione examining the 'wounds'. Draco winced "Rats? Don't they like…have the plague?" He questioned fearfully. "It was the fleas actually." Corrected Hermione automatically. "We'd better get you back to Hogwarts…" she said decisively. "I think we should postpone the Hogsmeade visit until tomorrow…" said Malfoy trying to get up and appear in some way in charge. "What –beep- -beeping- son of –beep- left the –beeping- man hole –beeping- open?" he asked furiously. Hermione and Luna exchanged a conspiratorial look over Draco' shoulder. "Let's concentrate on getting you back right now…" Draco nodded and pushed some of his pale hair out of his face.

They began the journey back Hogwarts in silence. Luna stayed behind to put the manhole lid back. Draco limped beside Hermione and stole a look at her *****Damn, that was bad…* he groaned inwardly. Hermione looked at him and fluttered her eyelashes "Same time tomorrow?" she said sweetly. Draco looked at her in disbelief *Wow, the old Malfoy charm worked better than I thought! * he thought smugly. 

They reached the Entrance Hall. Stopping Hermione spoke "I enjoyed speaking to you today." She said shyly and gave him a quick peck on the cheek. She walked away slowly up the stairs. Draco watched her go. The hormones made all pain vanish. He smirked and walked towards the Slytherin dorms. Everything was going to plan.

~*~

Well, its here, finally… I hope you enjoyed it and if you have please review. If you hated it and wished you'd never set eyes on it, review and just lie. Thank you. And have a nice day. This here chapter was written under the heavy influence of Mint Imperials.

Sheep the adventurer & Algiers (a muse)


	6. Chapter 6: Hogsmeade Take 2

Disclaimer: let me see, I'm not out of school, I'm not married, I don't have kids and I'm not phenomenally rich. Yeah, I'm reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaally J K Rowling. Can I just get on with the story now?

Authors Note: I apologise if this is delayed, I now have an (even better) social life.

'Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeww!' Hermione squealed once back in the Gryffindor common room. She dashed to the bathroom and brushed her teeth, rinsing round her mouth twice with extra strong mouthwash and wiping her lips on the back of her hand. She then stared with disgust at her hand and promptly washed it with soap in hot water. Once she was satisfied she was clean, she went back to the common room and sank into a soft armchair next to the fire. Harry and Ron were playing wizard's chess and Ginny was curled up reading the new book by Galexia Newhawk. Harry noticed Hermione and sat back from the game, raising a questioning eyebrow. Ron looked round, and Ginny glanced up reluctantly from her book. The second she saw Hermione her book was thrown aside, unfortunately straight into the fire, and she moved closer, her eyes glowing with curiosity as she asked 'well, how did it go? Tell us everything!' Hermione smiled as she saw her friends lean in, listening intently.

She told them of all that had happened. They listened to her story, laughing inwardly at the trick they were playing, and how perfectly it was going, and laughing outwardly about Luna and the person-hole. They didn't even notice the yells of 'ohmigod, the fire, it's glowing green. Oh, which idiot threw a magical book in there? Wait a minute, that's that new one by Galexia thingammy-whatsit, quick, get it out GET IT OUT!' Even the rush of pupils to the fireplace to retrieve the smouldering story didn't distract them, that is until one smart student decided to flick the book out the fire, straight into the lap of Ron. He yelled, jumped up and did a strange war dance around the chairs where they were sitting, trying to cool the unfortunate area in which the book had landed. When he saw Harry reach for another random liquid lying around, his eyes widened, he whimpered and sat down hurriedly, as far away from Harry as possible, insisting he was absolutely fine.

Hermione looked on with interest, a slight smile on her face, watching Ron slightly more closely than a friend really should. He glanced across at her, with the clothes around that area still smoking as he had refused any extinguishing from Harry, and smiled. She returned this then looked away, before either a blush or giggle could escape from her, and continued laughing and planning more evil schemes, ignoring the small random whimperings from Ron.

They decided that the next day would have to be much better than the one just gone, if they were going to seek the perfect revenge, after all they couldn't have Draco falling down person-holes everyday, it cut short the 'date'. Eventually it was determined that she and Draco would meet in the Great Hall, walk down to Hogsmeade then go back to the lake to sit and talk before going to dinner. They owled Draco accordingly then retired to bed, at the respectable hour of two in the morning. Ron was laughing evilly as he walked up to the boys' dormitory, before choking on the Liquorice wand he was eating. Harry patted him on the back and rolled his eyes at Ginny and Hermione, then guided Ron up the stairs and out of sight. They smiled and walked up to bed, discussing girl-y things such as clothes and make-up and how hopeless some boys are etc…..Ginny said 'get a good night's sleep, you need to be beautiful tomorrow, and being tired and having bags under your eyes isn't exactly fashionable.'

'Thanks for that, oh wise one,' replied Hermione, 'may I ask what I should wear? I was thinking something that I could sleep in now so it's all creased and wrinkled. What do you think?' Ginny made a 'hmmmmm' sound and narrowed her eyes before saying goodnight and departing to her dorm. Hermione entered her own and collapsed onto her bed. She muttered an incantation to change her clothes (being good at magic comes in handy if you're too tired or lazy to do something) and lay back, thinking what had she got herself into. She was dreading tomorrow, but she knew what she had to do. She drifted off, dreaming that Draco had post-traumatic first 'date' syndrome and she wouldn't have to do what they had planned. In the next bed, Parvarti dreamed of Professor Snape suffering from amnesia and forgetting to wear male clothes….

The next morning Hermione woke to the sound of 'Wake up, it's a beautiful morning, perfect for getting revenge' being sung by Ginny, who was jogging up and down the dormitory (A/N my teacher once did something very similar whilst on a school trip overnight. It's disturbing.) Anyway, Hermione opened her eyes a crack to focus on her magical time-keeping piece (in other words a clock) and saw to her horror it was just gone half 7. She had overslept, something which was very unlike her, she usually woke at quarter to 7 to get in some light reading before everyone else was up and causing distractions. Not that she thought of Ron (and Harry) as distractions, but she had to be sociable when they were around, she couldn't very well ignore Ron (and Harry) so she couldn't read as much. She re-thought over what she had just thought, confused herself further and fell back onto her pillow groaning. Ginny danced over and yanked the covers of Hermione's bed. Hermione squealed and curled into a ball, giving an evil look at Ginny. Well, actually an evil look at the washbasin, because Ginny had moved and Hermione couldn't see where she was looking as her eyes were screwed up.

'Come on lazy, we need to make you look amazing for today, we can't have a fiasco like yesterday!' chirped Ginny, 'and what has the washbasin ever done to you?'

Hermione opened her eyes to see what she was talking about, and saw the innocent article directly in her line of view, whilst the offending individual was standing on her other side looking slightly puzzled but none-the-less cheerful, with a cheesy grin spread across her face.

They finished beautifying surprisingly quickly, and went into the common room to meet the boys. They were already there, with Ron struggling with a potions essay and Harry predicting his slow and painful death next Tuesday. They saw Hermione and Ginny enter and both praised the girls on their style. 'No, Ron, I am not going to help you with your potions essay, so stop with the flattery,' remarked Hermione. Ron widened his eyes and looked scandalised at Hermione.

'I? Flatter you in return for help with really, really hard potions work?' questioned Ron, 'I couldn't imagine being more offended, how could you possibly think I'd do something like that?' He raised a questioning eyebrow at Hermione, who quipped 'oh, grow up!' before walking over to the portrait hole and asking 'is anyone coming down to the Great Hall with me?' The rest of the group shook their heads so she sighed, shrugged and went off alone.

She soon reached the Hall, and on entering found Draco, no, Malfoy, sitting at the Slytherin table staring into space. He looked smart; his hair gelled back as usual, except this time two thin strands hung down either side of his forehead, giving an illusion of curtains. Unfortunately, he also looked as if a large, dangerous beast with 4foot long teeth was sitting right in front of him, eyeing him and licking his lips. His eyes couldn't be any wider, and the look of sheer terror was second to none. Hermione pondered just how much he resembled a petrified ferret, but realised that she was smiling, so she concentrated on the horrible task she had to undertake. That soon wiped the smile off her face.

She stepped up beside Malfoy, who turned and smiled weakly on seeing who it was. He stood up, rearranged his facial features into a slightly more becoming expression, and proffered his arm to Hermione. 'shall we?' he asked. She nodded, trying hard not to show her reluctance, and off they set into the sunset…..err, I mean, set off to Hogsmeade…

They reached Hogsmeade, and spent a leisurely first hour wandering. They went to a discreet little café off the main road where they talked, rather awkwardly it has to be said, then afterwards they went walking. They were about to leave the busiest part of Hogsmeade, and Draco casually slipped his hand round Hermione's waist, leaning into her slightly, when suddenly a 'rraaaaaaarrrrrggggghhhhh' followed by a rush of ginger hair tackled a thoroughly shaken Draco to the ground. Hermione looked on as Fred and George Weasley tried to pummel Malfoy, whilst yelling things such as 'you try it on with her again and I'll beeping-beep you' and 'what the beep do you think you were beeping doing with her?!' Eventually she managed to prise the twins from a whimpering pale mass, explaining to them that she and Draco (shudder) were on a 'date' and that he was perfectly correct to have his arm round her. She added, almost as an afterthought, that if they didn't believe her, then they should ask Ron (or Harry). At this she discreetly winked at them. They eyed each other, raising alternate eyebrows, apologised to Hermione for interrupting, glanced contemptuously at Draco and walked off.

She watched Draco slowly rise from the floor, shaking slightly from the shock, and his hair now rebelling against the gel and sticking up at many unruly angles. When he looked at her, his eyes were wide, and despite everything she couldn't help but feel slightly sorry for him, the detestable, annoying, narrow-minded git. 'Maybe we should go back to Hogwarts? Things seem to be against us in Hogsmeade,' she said. Draco smiled weakly and began hobbling up the road, supported by Hermione. My god, how much more can go wrong? She's gonna think I'm a complete… thought Draco. My god, how much more can go wrong? He's such a… thought Hermione.

Finally, Draco limped through the school gates and was ready to leave her, but she fluttered her eyelashes, brushed against his arm and suggested that maybe they could go down to the lake and watch the sunset? Thinking that she must really be into him if she still wanted to be with him after the events of the day, he agreed, his Malfoy smugness over-riding his pathetic urge to just crawl back into bed. So they made their way slowly to the lake (Malfoy was still in pain) and seated themselves on some rocks. In front of them, the sky was ablaze with reds and oranges, whilst pink clouds rolled by. Slowly, the pink turned to purple, the red deepened and the orange slowly dissolved away. The sun, on its final attempt to rule over the sky, spilled out the last of its gold, filling the sky and reflecting off the still sparkle of water, before sinking behind the horizon. The 'couple' watched this, dreading the moment that would surely come in such a romantic setting as this. They turned their heads to face each other, looking deep into each other's eyes, cold blue/grey into soft brown, whilst their lips moved ever closer. Draco could feel her warm breath on his cheek; she could hear the softness of his breathing, and pounding of his heart. Time slowed down as the anticipation built up, breathing quickened, lips parted in readiness. A faint breeze blew, causing the water to ripple, and splash against the banks. The two paid no attention; they were caught in the moment. Hermione closed her eyes, thinking 'well, this is it…' and then nothing. Her lips did not find Draco's. She opened her eyes in time to see him flying through the air, a large black tentacle tightly wrapped round his waist, before being plunged into the icy depths of the lake.

At that moment, instead of feeling sympathy for the floundering ferret, all she could think was 'even the squid is against him.'

Authors Note: FINALLY I have managed to complete this. If you don't like it, tough luck you moaning wotsits. (My computer just tried to correct that to wetsuits. Stupid thing) and I am aware that whatsits is spelt whatsits, but the other way is more amusing for me. Anyway, if you did like it, review!!!

It's your turn to write now, sheep!


	7. Chapter 7: Make and Break

Harry Potter and the Teenage Angst

Chapter 7

Hermione watched with wide eyes as the tentacle waved around, clutching Draco. It alternately plunged into the lake with the Slytherin yelling all the way, then back out.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH _bubble bubble _AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH! _Splash._"

Hermione shook herself out of her reverie, and not being entirely sure what to do, screamed "Put him down at _once,_ you hear?" in such a voice of authority that even the Great Squid who Doth Reside the in The Lake decided it was in his best interests to maybe put that boy down.

Almost reluctantly, a sodden Draco was deposited without ceremony on the bank. Hermione hurried over to him in the darkening twilight. "Are you alright?" she questioned curiously.

Draco swept some wet hair out of his eyes and spat out some pond weed. "Fine!" he said roughly "Never better!" He pushed himself up, waving away Hermione's help.

He stood facing her "Somehow, I don't think we're quite meant to be." He said, pouting. Hermione gasped dramatically "But Draco!"

"I'm sorry, I like you, but honestly, I'm beginning to fear for my life." He spat out. "Oh well, you're only a mudblood I suppose." He stormed off.

Hermione watched him go and sighed. "This is going to be difficult." A random tentacle in the lake waved lazily at her.

She made her way back to the common room and stood in front of the Fat Lady "Wugglemuffin." She said gloomily. After hearing no response she looked up at the painting, puzzled, only to see it was empty. She peered into it "Er, hello?"

The portrait swung open and Harry stood there, his arms folded. He smiled at her and beckoned her inside. The portrait swung shut behind her. "What's going on?" asked Hermione in confusion "Where's the Fat Lady?"

Harry sighed and led her into the common room. Ron sat by the fire, he looked up as they entered. "I see you're back." He said rather unnecessarily. "How'd it go?"

Hermione sat down and subconsciously smoothed down her skirt. "Where's the Fat Lady?"

Ron snorted "She's gone to a Weight Watchers meeting with the teachers. And now we refer to her as the 'Dimensionally Challenged Lady', she's trying to shed the whole fat look I suppose." He waved a hand and rested his head back on the couch.

"So how'd it go?"

Hermione shook her head "Not good."

Harry sat down too with an inquisitive expression.

She saw and twisted the hem of her skirt with an anxious hand "He got sick of all the near death experiences."

Ron raised his eyebrows "Experiences?"

Hermione looked up "You know, falling down a manhole, being attacked by Fred and George and being thrown around by the Giant Squid."

Ron winced "Don't forget the Womble experience."

"Heh." Hermione leant back. "Guys? What are we going to do? Continue? He seemed pretty mad."

Ron put his arms behind his head and rested back comfortably. "He'll be back." He said confidently.

Harry picked up 'A Brief History of the Universe' and began reading silently.

A few first years were playing a game of Wizards Chess, a small girl with pigtails cried when her pretty pony knight was brutally smashed by the rather smug looking enemy bishop. It then hopped across the board to flirt with the Queen.

Hermione watched and a slight smile crossed her face. Ginny suddenly swept down the stairs to the girl's dormitory and rushed over to Hermione. She reached and gasped "How….did….it….go?" she panted.

Hermione groaned "Fantastic, I'm going to marry him." She said flatly.

"Nonsense," said Ginny promptly "You're going to marry Ron."

Ron choked and Harry thumped him on the back, making the poor Weasley cough even more. Hermione flamed a bright red "Ginny!" she hissed venomously.

Ginny rolled her eyes and grabbed Hermione's arm "Come with me." She dragged the aforementioned girl over to the girl's dormitory stairs and they went up.

Harry and Ron watched them go. "Girls." Said Ron hoarsely "Never understand 'em." Harry nodded emphatically.

Parvati's black cat 'Blackie' mewed plaintively and wound itself around Hermione's legs. The ignominiously named 'Blackie' was accepted as the 'odd black cat that likes to eat peoples' socks'. Which, indeed, it was guilty of.

She scratched it behind its ears absently. It coughed up a bit of chewed sock at her feet and meowed proudly.

Crookshanks wandered over and hissed at Blackie, settling himself on Hermione's lap with a hint of possessiveness.

Blackie ran off.

Ginny paced around the dormitory. "We need to think of something! He needs to be taught a lesson!"

Hermione shook her head, feeling vaguely dizzy after watching Ginny. "I suppose the several near death experiences weren't enough then?"

Ginny sat down "Oh yeah…"

Meanwhile on the other side of the castle, a person coughed.

Hermione flopped back on her bed. "Its hopeless." She said despondently, "Besides, I feel cheap."

"Revenge doesn't make you cheap." Said Ginny brusquely, hanging up a shirt.

"Whatever." Sighed Hermione.

The next morning they woke up bright and early, then realised they had no socks, then chased Blackie the cat around Gryffindor tower, only get back chewed up bits of what once was their socks.

Ron and Harry looked up, surprised, when an exhausted Hermione and Ginny sat down opposite them. 'Blackie?' Harry's face seemed to question.

Hermione nodded glumly. Ginny nudged Hermione suddenly. "Ouch!" cried Hermione and glared at the redhead. "He's watching you." Whispered Ginny.

Hermione glanced up and saw Draco's head jerk away. "Hello." Said Ginny with a grin.

On the other table Draco sniffed and ate some bacon. His two friends, Crabbe and Goyle grunted and attacked their food. Draco watched with vague disgust, he never seemed to get used to it.

"Draco?" a smooth voice inquired.

The blonde boy looked up to see Blaise Zambini, the androgynous Slytherin, who no-one actually knew if what gender they were.

"Yes?" he replied.

Blaise sat down, nodding to Crabbe and Goyle.

"I have heard that you have been dating the Gryffindor mudblood. You know your father would not appreciate this."

"Just playing Blaise." Said Draco carefully.

Blaise chuckled evilly (actually a perquisite for being a Slytherin, the capability to chuckle evilly). "I'm sure you are."

After the pointless threatening was over, Blaise retreated off to read some more of "Unisex- we're all the same really", a radical new magazine dictating that the differences between men and women were too pronounced these days. However it was not a very popular publication, read only by Blaise and a hermit living in south Lichtenstein.

Draco blinked and ate some porridge, oblivious to the fact that he had been eating bacon and eggs a few minutes ago.

Some things in our world are meant to stay secret.

The first lesson was Arithmancy. However, no-one important took that lesson, just a few random weird people who chose to study maths when you could learn how to do magic stuff. Therefore they are not important.

So, for our important characters, the first lesson was charms.

Professor Flitwick clambered inelegantly onto the pile of books that would enable him to actually look at his class, and not just their shoes.

"Class!" he squeaked "Today we will learn a very important charm! It is …"

Flitwick's voice faded to a background murmur as Draco watched, bored out of his small vindictive mind.

It probably was an important charm, like one to clean a room or bake a cake. But Draco wasn't that interested in such things. Unwillingly his eyes were drawn to the brunette girl over the room. Her hair was being tossed around lightly by an unknown draught that only seemed to affect her, and a golden light shone on her from the window. From outside, the school choir started up.

Draco frowned and tried to think over the odd strain of 'I feel it in my fingers'. He had to admit, he still wanted to…have a deep and meaningful relationship with Hermione? Not really, he just wanted to '_feel it in my toes…'_. He swore inwardly as the song interrupted his thoughts.

His head sank slowly onto the smooth wood of the desk. It was hard being a teenager with money, hormones and other stuff, he thought sadly.

Meanwhile Hermione had mastered the spell, learned its three lesser uses and found a vital clue in the Kennedy assassination as well as flicking her hair in a chic fashion in the time Draco had been wallowing like a piggy in self pity.

Her eyes flickered over to the blonde teen, he seemed to be poking an inkpot half heartedly with his wand while Crabbe and Goyle guffawed at a fly that had walked through some ink and was leaving fly footprints all over Crabbe's work.

Draco sniffed and pulled a piece of scrap parchment towards him, it was no use, he had to see her.

Hm, I appreciate that this isn't great, its been kind of written over a while. Ahem.


End file.
